Sunday, September 6, 2020

Love: How does your love relationship look?

Everyone is looking for love, and it comes in many forms. Whether its through friendship, family, and/or a committed relationship, everyone is in need of belonging. It is human nature to want to be loved, and have an emotional connection to another human being. Many people say love is hard to describe. Also, love is hard work! Whatever your definition of love is, you have to be willing to work to keep your definition alive. Here are 5 questions you can ask yourself to find out what type of love is right for you.




  1. What is your definition of love?- You can ask 5 different people what love is? Everyone's definition of love will be different. So how can someone tell you what type of love works for you? As you grow, your love needs may change, and that is OK. What is your definition of love is a key question? You cannot expect someone to know what your love definition is, if you do not know it yourself. 
  2. What do you need to get out of your love relationship?- Weather your love needs are a friendship, family, and/or a committed relationship, an evaluation is needed to know your own expectations. Once you know your own expectations, it will be easier to communicate your expectations to others.
  3. What is your deal breaker?- Many people have actions they will not tolerate in a relationship.  These actions are know as, "deal breakers". Usually a "deal breaker" is based on past experiences. Many love relationships split because these "deal breakers" are committed, and no communication about what they are were made. 
  4. How do you communicate your love needs?- As crazy as this sounds, a huge elaborate production is not needed. What works for one person, may not work for another. Verbally stating your needs is not a crime. If stating your needs is a problem, then maybe the love relationship is not the correct fit. Also, as you grow as an individual, your love needs may change. Continue to communicate your needs as you grow.
  5. What effort are you willing to put into your definition of love?- Everyone has a different amount of energy they are willing to put into a relationship. But before you bail on any type of love relationship ask yourself: Have you defined your definition of love? Have you answered what do you need to get out of your type of love relationship? Have you defined your deal breakers? Have you communicated your love needs? Only then will you know if the love relationship is worth keeping. Remember, this is a decision only you can make!

* How does your love relationship look? Please share in the comment box below, and subscribe via e-mail in the right column. Thanks in advance for reading and sharing.*

4 comments:

Wani said...

Great insightful information.

Shawon Henry, RN, MSN, PCCN said...

Thank you Wonnie for responding.I hope it helps:-)!

Dee Deas said...

Hope this isn't getting away from what the topic is and forgive me if it sounds cliche but loving me in every way possible and first is the best part of any love relationship that I have. Im completely ok with me and SO happy with me and from there it spills over to all of my love relationships....I have to be in tune with myself first and then everything else becomes easy ....from the communication to the time/energy put in...and not only easy but I feel like my expectations are very few as well and this all plays a role in me being a happy person and happy with the love relationship with myself first....sorry if this is all over the place but I tried my best to explain without writing for days 😏

Shawon Henry-Jacobs RN, MSN, PCCN said...

Hello Deas,
Thank you for your comment. I think I know what you are trying to say. What I got out of your comment is you have to be intuned with yourself before you can have expectations from others. Also, you need to love yourself. With hese two things it will transfer into a relationship. I agree with love and communication. You cannot have expectations from others when you do not know what your own expectations are? I believe a key factor is knowing where you are personally on that journey and being open in the communication process with your significant other. Some people find themselves in a relationshp and realize they have not achieved prior self love goals. I challenge you to think of this group. How does this specific group of people fix this situation? As always, thank you for your comment:-), Im looking foward to your thoughts.